I have a hole in my shirt this morning, right in the armpit region. Like a woman who puts on stockings hoping no one really sees the run, I am well aware of the hole, and I try my best to disguise it by playing it close to the vest so to speak. I know I need to give up on this shirt, and there's really no need to constantly sport it, but I can't give it up. Of the shirts I wear in my fall/winter line, this shirt is, and will always be my favorite. It's a deep orange, and I bought it from Banana Republic back in '02. It fits me perfectly, and I know they still sell it at BR, but who wants to break in another shirt of this kind. When people are able to penetrate my guard, and notice the hole, I don't even try to play it off..I just look at them as if to say, "YEAH, AND?!?!". I need to visit my dry cleaners one of these days, to get them to sew the hole closed. The last time I attempted to do that, I was told that wouldn't really help, and it could quite possibly tear again. So alas, I keep the shirt in rotation..I even wore it on a first date earlier this year. The woman commented on how nice my shirt was, and luckily(or unluckily) for me, the date never progressed to anything romantic, otherwise my hole(as opposed to hers) would have been exposed. So when you see me in the street, and I have on this shirt, kindly greet me, then the hole..neither one of us are going anywhere.

There was no internet access yesterday at my job, due to some outage, and since I currently do not have a computer at my place of residence, there was no blog yesterday. Not only was there no blog, but I couldn't check my non-work emails, my fantasy football progress, my favorite e-columnists, or any of that. I felt like I was back in the early 90s...but I did have my most productive day in quite some time. A few people called me and tried to act like they cared what I had to say, but they really wanted to know why the hell I hadn't written a blog. I must admit it made me feel special(not the short yellow bus kind) for just a few seconds. Given the minor turmoil in my life right, a touch of specialness(if you will) does the ego very good. I had all these things in my mind that I wanted to say yesterday, and now I have forgotten them. They have fallen into the unknown abyss of my mind..in fact that will be the name of the first single off my yet to be recorded CD..The Unknown Abyss Of My Mind.

I am in the process of letting both my hair and my beard out, and it isn’t pretty at all. I know the men and women at my job, are tempted to throw money at my desk..I look that rugged. The beard is trimmed and my hair is lined up, but it looks way more rugged than I typically allow it too. When you don’t have a ladyfriend around everyday telling you what looks good and what doesn’t, you tend to take a few more risks with your physical appearance. That being said, I have a wedding to attend this weekend, and I will be cleaning up nicely for that. I wouldn’t want to scare away the guests or my date.

I spoke to my brother this weekend, and he is definitely ecstatic about finally being a father. He also made sure that all pictures of his son were taken in masculine colors. Apparently the nurses, tried to throw some pink and green his way, and Jamal wasn’t having it. As he explained to my mother, they do live in Atlanta, and that type of thing has to be nipped in the bud quickly. Homophobia? Maybe, but at least he gets it honest. I can’t imagine how the fathers of gay sons feel. I mean sure they cope with it, and they never stop loving their child, but how do you react when you son says, Dad, I’m gay, I take it in the butt, and frankly, I’m loving every minute of it. There’s no manual for how to deal with that. So far so good for me though.

Oh and by the way, I think the blog powers-that-be have nixed my ability to post links to songs. I’ve tried to post links the past two blog entries, and I’ve been rejected. It is indeed the end of a 3 month era.