Thursday, January 18, 2007

At first I was going to have a party at a club, and then I switched it to having a get together at a bowling alley/sports bar, but finally I have settled in on going out of town for my birthday, which is how I like it best. My boys gave me flack (as is their job) for selling them out, but considering we can and will hang out on any weekend, it isn't so bad. So I've decided to go out to New Mexico for a few days to spend time with my ladyfriend. She has numerous things planned for me, and most of them she won't tell me, which I can take. But one of the things she DID tell me about is her plans to take me to a strip club. Now, I really am not a strip club kind of man, and before you put the gay label on me, allow me to explain. My ego has a hard time paying someone to shake their ass in my face and on my lap..if I'm on my game, and I'm giving 110%(or 1000% as Shaq said last night), I should be able to get a woman to do that for free, in the privacy of my own home. Plus, strip clubs are filled with dudes who are all trying to get the attention of a few women..the ratios are all out of wack. Am I overthinking? Yes. But still..that's what I do. That being said, the prospect of going to a strip club with my ladyfriend is intriguing for many many reasons, but I'll spare you the dirty details. I was hesistant to do this at first, but now I'm hyped. This 32nd birthday should be quite memorable indeed.

I do not understand how cable companies get away with giving you a 3 hour window to fulfill their obligation to you. I left work early for cable appointment, and I was told that they would be at my house between 2 and 5 pm. So I left work at 1pm, ran an errand, and then I was in my house safely by 1:45. I took a nap, I listened to my brand spanking new Miles and Coltrane box set, I talked to my ladyfriend, my dad, and another friend of mine, and before I knew it, the 5:00 hour had come and gone. I didn't get a courtesy call saying they were running late or anything. When I called them, they made it seem like I was being unreasonable, and they casually told me that they should be at my house soon. No auxillary time was given, just a vague "soon". What kind of bullshit is that? when you go to the doctor's office, or an attorney's office, or even an interview, they give you an exact time, and you are expected to adhere to it. If you miss the appointment, you can often times be fined, or you'll be forced to reschedule(pronounced Shed-dule with a Bri-tish accent). But the cable company can just run roughshod over my time, and I'm expected to get over it? That's not fair. Of course I tried to bitch and moan, but it got me nowhere.

I caught a bit of Inside the Actors Studio last night, as he does every show, James Lipton ended with ten questions, that I've decided to tackle in this here blog.

What is your favorite word? willy-nilly
What is your least favorite word? cunt
What turns you on [creatively, spiritually or emotionally]? watching a woman get dressed in the morning or watching it snow
What turns you off? Loud people
What is your favorite curse word? bitch-ass motherfucker
What sound or noise do you love? The sound of John Coltrane's saxophone
What sound or noise do you hate? babies crying
What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? an NBA referee
What profession would you not like to do? airplane bathroom cleaner
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Thank you

Falling - Jamiroquai


hadassah444 said...

New Mexico sounds nice be sure to give 1000% and relax...

LittleTortilla stays in DC said...

We had 5 different comcast appointments and they only showed up for one. When they did show up the guy didn't have the correct equipment. So we had to cancel. They really suck. Have fun in NM.

Jo said...

I love it! I love it! I love it!

The ten questions were great! You had me LOLing with the airplane bathroom. I would have never thought of that one!

You will have a great B-day I am sure. And you really have to appreciate a lady that is confident enough to go to the strip club with her man. Big ups to your LadyFriend. Young chicks are so worried about being upstaged they can't seem to find the excitement and adventure in it. So don't over-analyze it, enjoy it. And 'sides, it will make for great sex later on . . .

And did the cable guy ever come? The suckers . . .

Miss Black River said...

I just had the same thing happen with my DSL - waited with no one showing up to do the service. A sharply worded letter is in the works on that one.

Happy B-day buddy - I just celebrated the 33rd on Dr. King's Holiday. Although I have never been to a strip club I am sure it will be fun with your ladyfriend in tow. Extended foreplay can be an erotic adventure.