Thursday, April 12, 2007

As I watched the three kids from the Duke lacrosse team give their press conference yesterday, I kept thinking to myself, man it HAS to suck being them right about now--and I felt badly for them. Not quite as bad as I did when I finally saw the Rutgers women, but close. Of course these dudes were drinking illegally, and they had hired strippers, but I know plenty of people in college who did the same. They just didn't get caught. And I can't sit here and say that I don't think that while drunk, these kids didn't let a racist/sexist slur slip out in the process, but again that's my own speculation, I can't prove that a bit. But for a man, to be accused of rape, then to be absolved of all guilt, only to have that public perception stick can be devastating. If you add that these kids lost their scholarships, and now will have that stigma on them is rough. If I were a CEO, would I want to hire these dudes, who while found to be innocent, might bring unwanted press and attention to my company? I don't know. I hope these kids can move on in their life..and this is just another example of how race has us jacked up in this country. There have been so many instances (Emmett Till) when white men have wronged black folks, and have gotten away with it. So when a scenario of rich white kids and a black stripper is presented, its just too good to dismiss. Even as I write this paragraph, I feel like a sellout to some degree, but I really shouldn't.

But just as all this attention is being placed on these Duke kids, someone needs to reach out to that woman who accused them of rape too. There are probably some issues going on within her, and clearly no one really understands it. Plus, SOMETHING happened that night, and her story and feelings shouldnt just be thrown under the bus.

So I designated this morning, as my return to running 3 miles at 5am. And right on cue, it was POURING rain when I got out there, and I know I run the risk of catching a cold and all that, but man was it fun. I was so busy enjoying the rain and the puddles, that I didn't even notice that my thighs were burning and I was way out of shape. I actually found myself smiling at one point. So my advice to you kids, is to run or play in the rain the next time you get an opportunity. It is fun and it wash all your troubles away.

Three women I know, are in the midst of some type of breakup. One, had a "special" relationship with her friend, abruptly ended when the guy found someone he wanted to be with, as opposed to just have sex with. The second woman is at a crossroads with her man, and all they do is fight, occasionally have sex, and then fight again. And the last woman thought she was going to work a problem out with her man, only to have him break it off abruptly. As I listen and talk to these women, I realize that in the past year, I have done ALL of those things, but you never really understand the other side until you remove yourself from the situations. I don't have the answers here, I just know that this is the reason female friends come in handy. Its like watching a DVD, and then clicking on the special features and interviews to see what's going on behind the scenes. I possibly could figure those things out on my own, but it sure helps to have some educated insight. I hope they all view me in the same light..

My Soul's Not For Sale - Raheem Devaughn featuring Jazzy Jeff

7 comments:

hadassah444 said...

Rashad, are you transforming?
this is nice

LittleTortilla stays in DC said...

Dude, I got my hair pressed I'm running from the rain right now.

The Duke thing is so crazy. I was living in Chapel Hill when this all happened and you wouldn't believe the tension surrounding this case. SOMETHING happened that night wether it was rape, a drug induced hallucination, or something else. I don't think people should point to her as liar but it is bound to happen. She needs help and I hope she is getting it.

Anonymous said...

:-)

Jo said...

Why shouldn't you feel like a sell out?

Running in the rain . . . dang . . . man that sounds like sooo much fun! How did you stay warm and I hope you don't get sick . . .

As for you side of the story. I am sure your blog is helping countless women to see that it's reall not about them . . .men are just crazy, confused bastards! LOL!

But as for the convos with you . . .they are so helpful and truly do help me to see the other side. Not just the male perspective, but also how looney female perspective can be sometimes. Thanks for that . . .

GemEnigma said...

very cool entry. like the development in the last para.

tia said...

the lobby tv is on one of those news stations and as i was coming back from lunch they had the duke accuser's high school photo with "duke liar" captioned big as day underneath it. however innocent those young men may be there's no reason that type of propaganda to be on the news. ugh.

Anonymous said...

oh paul, i think i told you, i'm a lover not a fighter...