Thursday, November 15, 2007

A few years ago, I saw this movie with Robert Deniro, Angela Bassett, Ed Norton and Marlon Brando entitled The Score. In the movie, Ed Norton played a man who was acting mentally challenged, in order to help his friends pull off a heist in an art gallery. Not until the very end of the movie, was his cover as a faux mental patient exposed, and by the then he had already gotten away with "The Score". Why do I bring this up?

There is this guy in my office who is mentally challenged named Brad. Brad's job is to empty the trash, and then replace the bag that's in my can. He and another mentally challenged fellow who doesn't speak a lick of English, usually alternate doing this task. Brad usually does this task in about 30 seconds, and then he spends the next minute or so engaging in small talk. The typical conversation goes like this:

Brad: So what are you doing this weekend, are you going to go out or stay kind of(every sentence ends in kind of)
Me: I think i'll just stay in relax
Brad: so you're just going to relax, that's good kind of, i'm going to stay in too kind of, or maybe catch a movie, yeah, kind of
Me: That's good man
Brad: have a nice day
me: you too brad
Brad: ok you too brad

I must admit the first couple of times he talked to me, I fell out laughing. I wasn't necessarily being mean I don't think, but when you're dealing with someone mentally challenged, you never know what you're going to get, and it can be humorous. Now its to the point where I don't even think twice about dealing with him, and I am very much used to seeing him and kicking the "mathmatics" if you will. But in the back of my mind, I think about that Ed Norton character from "The Score". And although there really isn't much to steal from my where I work, what if he's faking it? What if he really just wants to slowly and methodically rob and steal from everyone on this floor? He has it so that everyone speaks to him, but they really don't pay close attention. He is in people's offices while their briefcases, bags, purses, and computers are very much in public view. In fact, I'm sure people would accuse me of stealing, before they confronted Brad. If he pulled that "Score" off, I wouldn't even be mad at him, in fact I'd come visit him in whatever jail they put him in, and I would ask him what prompted him to do it, and then I'd try to write a story and profit off his ass.

Soon I'll Be Loving You Again - Marvin Gaye
I'm well aware that I have posted this song before, but I'm posting again. Why? because the song is dirty, and from the 1:53 mark of the song until the end, Marvin chants "I'm gonna give you some head" in the background about 45 times in a row. Who doesn't love that kind of persistence?


hadassah said...

I need to rent The Score now..

maxwellsmusze said...

a mental retardation heist followed by hot & heavy horny marvin. this is GOLD!

lex said...

lol Brad calls you Brad??

Marvin Gaye is an interesting artist to listen to with ones parents. when i was younger i didnt know what the heck he was talking about so it was cool. But then I got older and he'd be talking all scan'lous -"ima knock you up right now woman"- and it was way awkward.

Fortunately he caresses his sexy talk so well, that you can barely hear it. Still, i refuse to listen to any album post "what's going on" with the 'rents. too much innuendo going on there.

Janelle said...

Damn I need to see the Score.
And Brad is writng a book on your ass on how you and everyone else (including me) laugh at his alleged mental handicaps. Brad will be on Oprah!! hahahahahahaa