I try not to do it too often because it can be kind of expensive, but everything now and then when the mood hits me, I like to visit Starbucks. My drink of choice is usually Caramel Apple Cider, although the other day I had a Gingerbread Latte that was quite tasty as well. Well this morning, the line in Starbucks was insanely long, so I decided to go a different direction, and I visited Caribou Coffee. This would allow me to 1)Avoid the headache and aggravation of the long line and 2)Use the $1 off coupon of theirs that I had been walking around with for over 3 weeks. So I go in the store, and it was basically empty except for other woman in there. I scanned the menu looking for the Caribou Coffee equivalent of Caramel Apple Cider, and then I see it. The title of the drink? Hot Apple Blast.

Now the first thing I did is re-read it to make sure I wasn't reading it wrong, but when I re-read it, it still said Hot Apple Blast, and in my mind I was like you gotta be f*cking kidding me man. So I go up to the counter, and there sat this big black dude who looked to be about 6"4 or 6"5, 300lbs, and once he opened his mouth I also noticed he was a bit sweet(read: ghey...not that there's anything wrong with that). So I look this man in the eye, and ask him for a Hot Apple Blast, and he chuckles and then rings me up. The only other woman in line chuckled too, and at this point, I decided something needed to be said. I asked everyone behind the counter if there was another synonym they could come up with for "blast" and everyone just burst out laughing...but I got no answer. The woman whose job it is to call out the drinks to the drink makers yelled out, "One Hot Apple Blast!", and the laughter continued. And when the guy finally gave me my drink he said, "Here's Your Hot Apple Blast sir", and before I took the drink from him I asked him how often this drink is ordered, and he said, not very often. I can't begin to tell you how dirty I feel drinking this drink. But if it means I can avoid long lines and aggravation, I'll get Hot Apple Blasts every damn day.

Blue - LeAnn Rimes