Monday, February 09, 2009

Dear Dr. Bronner's Peppermint Soap.

When I first met you back in 2002, you belonged to someone else, but I used to sneak time with you when I could. I had heard good things about you, but I was so used to Irish Spring. and I didn't want to completely abandon that. But the few times I did sneak time with you? Man you were good. I could use just a little of you, and it seemed to go such a long way. On top of that, you had this tingling aspect to you that felt incredible in my nether regions, you know..down there where it counts.

Not too long after I met you, my living arrangements changed, and I no longer had free access to you. I mean yeah I would see you out and about, but I didn't have the courage to step to you (plus you cost 14 damn dollars), but in my mind I knew that I would one day find my back to you. And then last week, while I was in the New Jersey Nets locker room. I saw someone who had access to you, and it rekindled the love affair all over. I looked longingly at you, and although you couldn't see, I saw you, gave you a head nod, and vowed to make you mine oh mine.

Yesterday I saw you (spent that 14 damn dollars), and I made you mine. I could have gotten with you last night, but instead I used my last bit of Irish Spring so I could have proper goodbye. This morning, after my morning workout, it was just you and me, and you felt just like I remembered..except harder, better, faster and stronger.
Sincerely

Rashad

P.S. Are you down for a threesome? My lady may want to get in on the action as well

10 comments:

GemEnigma said...

You sincerely need help, my friend. :-P

Miss. Lady said...

I am so disturbed by this... LOL!

Jamal said...

You need some therapy dude. Some real long sessions too.

GD. said...

That shit is great, mayne.

But you're right. I always have to give that purchase a looooong consideration. $12 for soap? that's type rough.

maxwellsmusze said...

WOW! seek help indeed. immediate help. HAHAHAHA!

theradleyfiles said...

I love that you can dilute it and it still feels the same..mos def worth the $$'s

£ said...

dr bronner's has that good good. its always a pleasure when I kick it with him.

also that bottle is excellent reading material. the day I understand it all is the day I unlock the secret to immortality and perfectly fried chicken.

Chubbs said...

what a lovely ode! i will say, for the ladies though, keep dr. bronners far away from the nether regions, particularly the peppermint and eucalyptus. he packs a powerful punch, that i for one, cannot handle.

Sab D said...

We ran out of the Peppermint Soap this morning - the dove bar thing is whack! I got to take $12 to kroger and get some more or else I'm going to be feeling odd using pink soap - ungh

Oh yeah the - Almond & lavender are lame - peppermint is the way to go!

Jazzbrew said...

I took my first little dance with Dr. Bronner... my goodness. I immediately remembered this post and had to hit you up. That stuff is the TRUTH...