So in my ongoing effort to stay in shape via fun and interesting activities, I officially decided to take up yoga. I actually made this decision while I was on vacation, and temporarily forgot about it until Wednesday afternoon. On Wednesday, while I was walking back into my building, a woman from the yoga spa two doors down from my job came up to me with a brochure. She explained to me all the dazzling things they did at her yoga spa, and she encouraged me to come in for a consultation. Now I had been blowing off and ignoring the people who worked for her spa for quite some time, because 1)they would bother me early in the morning, while I was en route to work and 2)they just came off as creepy cult members. I want no parts of that.
But on this day, I was just as chatty as she was. I explained to her that I was ready to take that leap into yoga, but I was concerned about finding the time, being the only man in the class, and contorting my body into highly sexual positions. She assured me it would be a positive experience, and I had nothing to worry about. She took my name and number, and I got her name (Lauren) and the brochure she was handing out. We made an appointment for Thursday at noon, and everything seemed ok.
Unfortunately for me, I forgot about the appointment, and then I realized I had a prior obligation at noon. I went swimming that morning, and around 11, I realized there was going to be yoga appointment, so I called Lauren and told her I needed to reschedule. She sounded disappointed, but I reminded her that I worked right next door, and this is no way was a blow off. I told her I would call next week to reschedule, and she said she had plenty of available appointments. She said, I'll hear from you next week, and I said cool. This was around 11am.
At 2pm Lauren called me again, and said she had some Thursday appointments free, and I re-explained to her, that I'd rather do it next week, when my schedule had a little more maneuverability, and she said she understood. At this point I was a little alarmed, but I figured she was trying to be thorough. There's nothing wrong with that at all.
At 5:30pm, Lauren called again (I missed her call and it went to my voicemail) and said her Friday was completely open, and if I was interested in coming in, I should just give her a call on her cell phone before 9pm. I looked at the phone and said aloud, "Are you f**king kidding me?". Not only was Lauren not listening (isn't that a yoga principle or something?), but now she was making it difficult for me to even consider joining her yoga spa, because she was pulling a Glenn Close on me before I even joined. Still, I decided I would ignore this call, and any others that came this week, and call next week. She could start fresh, I could still get a consultation, everyone wins.
This morning I come into work almost 90 minutes early to get a jump start on things, and guess who I see? Lauren. Because I had my headphones on, I didn't even realize she was behind me, but she came up to me, touched my shoulder, and was like HEYYY Rashad. I turned around, and I know my facial expression was one of terror, but I just smiled and said hello Lauren. The following conversation went down:
Lauren: So are normally at work this early?
Me: No, I'm just to get a jump start on some things
Lauren: Cool beans. Do you want to come in the yoga spa later today?
Me: Nope, next week is still my preference
Lauren: You aren't getting cold feet are you?
Me: Not at all, I just have less conflicts next week. Are you always this persistent?
Lauren (with a confused look): What do you mean?
Me: Never mind
Lauren (touching my forearm): We just don't get a lot of guys in the spa. They show interest then leave, and I don't want you to do the same
Me: (moving back a bit so her arm and my forearm detach): Well I'm a man of my word Lauren, I'll see you next week.
Lauren: You have my contact info right?
I didn't answer that last question, I just put gave her the thumbs up and walked away from her. Now, I know I'm extra sensitive to these types of things, but I think I detected some creepy behavior. Am I wrong here?
Newness - Musiq
3 comments:
LOL! Ummm.... Rashad, be afraid, be very, very afraid!
Go with your gut on this one, but Lauren sounds like a stalker to me.
No comment on Lauren - but I'm cracking up about her.
Do the Yoga. I never did it with swimming, but I've taken the class three times - loved it. I was the only guy to finish the class sessions (other dudes would drop out after 2 or so classes). Super workout, I actually felt taller.
The old ladies would laugh as I attempted to do some of the postures - I mean how often can they be better than a young guy in an athletic feat, so they got their kicks in.
Once we were meditating - it got good to me and I fell asleep. Class was dismissed folks was going home & I was laid out with my legs going up the wall. Needless to say that was the running joke. But I enjoyed it.
One thing though - I know I'm married & you're in a relationship and all that - but I wish I had taken it in the city. The "scenery" would have been better in class. I was there with basket weavers, quilt makers and soccer moms - so there were no distractions for me.
But holla at the yoga, man
Oh my. I'm afraid Lauren just might be waiting for you every day before work to see when you pass by so she can ask you again. She scares me.
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