Thursday, September 03, 2009

Tomorrow morning at 7am, despite my bruised hip and nervous feelings, I will be taking my first ever yoga class. As you may recall me mentioning last week, I initially wanted to take the class at this yoga spa right next door to my job. The lady who was trying to recruit me was persistent and creepy, but I still was willing to give it a chance, because it was so close to my job. Then one day when I finished swimming at the JCC, I saw a sign that mentioned there was a sunrise yoga class every Friday at 7am. The most important word of that sign was "free", which is possible because I am a paying member of the JCC. That's a win-win situation.

So I called creepy lady, explained to her the free yoga was much better than creepy-lady-in-my-face-everyday-yoga, and I would have to pass on her enticing offer. She then attempted to dazzle me with a 5 minute oral presentation over the phone (that sentence could have gone horribly wrong) about how good her spa was, and how free yoga was almost sure to be inferior to what she was offering. I threw her a bone (also a minefield of a phrase) and told her that if my free yoga failed to tickle my fancy, I would consider her spa as an alternative.

Now, I have a few concerns about yoga. One, I was worried that I would have to purchase and then carry a "yoga mat" to class. I walk/run to and from the JCC when I go there to workout, and I'd do the same for yoga class. But what if I were walking down the street with a damn yoga mat on my person, I would surely lose all of my dwindling street cred. Secondly, I've been told that yoga poses can be pretty unintentionally erotic and sexual. I could see a pose, think dirty thoughts and BOOM, erection time!!!! That'll get me kicked out of class, arrested or maybe even cause me to receive unwanted offers of sexual favors. All those choices are bad news. And I know that sound immature, but hey, this is me we're talking about. I have other concerns that involve having to endure yoga induced, random passing of gas from class members, yoga attire, and looking like a damn fool, but I'll spare you all for now.

Tomorrow's entry and report of day one at yoga class should be pretty damn hilarious. In the meantime, please watch the video directly under this entry. The video is slightly depressing, but the song is great.

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