Thursday, May 13, 2010

First off, my stay classy award goes to the gentleman I saw right outside my job this morning. He had his two girls with him--one looked to be seven, the other looked around four years old. He also was pushing a stroller, an in it was a girl who looked to be under a year old. As I approached them, they were all laughing and joking and having a jovial time. Then, a woman with a short skirt and black stockings walked by and everything changed.

This guy abruptly stopped laughing, maneuvered his gaze around his two daughters, and stared at this woman for a good 30 seconds. Of course the woman was oblivious to this, which is good, because that could have only made the situation worse. Still, this guy made no attempts to mask his desire to get a thorough look at this woman. Just as I was crossing the street, I overheard one of his daughters say, "Daddy what are you looking at?" to which the father responded, "Nothing, let's cross the street."

Now maybe I'm overreacting a bit, but if I had young kids with me, and a woman with a big ass and legs exposed walked by, I might steal a quick glance, but that's it. That would just have to be one bit of eye candy I missed out on, because that's just not the age to be exposing kids to that level of perverse behavior. If my son was with me, I may show him that side of me when he was much older, but it would come with an explanation. For daughters, I just wouldn't do it. But again, I could be wrong here.

I would also like to apologize to my neighbor (she's told me her name many times, but I don't remember it). Clearly you weren't expecting anyone to come out of their apartment at 6 in the morning. Because if you were, you wouldn't have jumped the way you did, when I came out of my apartment, and saw you and your girlfriend kissing in a way that I've only seen in adult movies. I didn't meant to scare you, I was just on my way out for my morning run. Then again, you have no clue how awkward that elevator ride was with your girlfriend. Her face was red, she kept fixing her hair, and I'm sure her loins were moist and alive, but I said nothing except, "Have a great day!"

Maybe Your Baby - Stevie Wonder


maxwellsmusze said...

moist and alive though?!?!? i'm done...LMFAO!!!

Jazzbrew said...

What he said... Hilarious.

I agree on the gawking though. Not cool.

Janelle said...

Well maybe, just maybe he knew the woman in the biblical sense and was stunned to see her while he was clearly in Daddy Day Care mode. Or I could be overreaching just a bit. hahahaha

BTW, moist and alive????? Only you, BLD. hahahahahaha

scout said...

lol @ moist and alive. yous a fool. so, wait... was it two women kissing? i figured I'd ask while I'm here cause I doubt i'm going to reread it :P but your neighbor is female, no?

rashad said...

yes ma'am, my neighbor is a lady

Redbonegirl97 said...

LOL, I crack up at this because I was having this convo with my friend about his son when I was listening to him talk to him on the phone. They were talking about whether or not a woman that was walking down the street had a body or not. He is 12 and they were talking about a grown women. He said his son couldn't stop looking, I told him he learned it from his daddy and he needs to start slapping him on the back of the head.

Peace, Love and Chocolate