Wednesday, June 23, 2010

I would like to personally thank the Kennedy Center for wearing me down and finally convincing me to give money to become an official member. For two years now, the beautiful men and women who work for you, have been bombarding me with phone calls and emails about joining your establishment. I usually listen to the pitch, momentarily consider pulling the trigger, and then I change my mind at the last minute. It always seems like a good investment, and then I look at the upcoming schedule and I get underwhelmed and turned off.

But my dear Kennedy Center, you stepped up your game tremendously this past weekend, and you went directly for my heart. You sent out just the jazz schedule for the next year or so and included some heavy hitters that I listen to often:

Bassist Christian McBride
Violinist Karen Briggs
2010 Grammy-winning vocalist Kurt Elling
Roy Hargrove (trumpet) and his Quintet
Terence Blanchard (trumpet), Branford Marsalis (sax) and their respective quintets AT THE SAME TIME IN THE SAME SHOW.

So yes, I will become a member, I will attend these shows as well as some of the other wonderful plays, musicals and educational experiences you have to offer, and I regret that it has taken me so long. All I ask is that you send me some type of gift for becoming a member.

I would also like to thank the property manager at my place of residence, for paying attention to all of the emails sent by his tenants, and finally coming to the building to feel the non-working air conditioning. You claimed it was now working, but then you were bombarded with emails to the contrary, so like Obama did with the oil-filled Gulf, you visited each apartment in the building, in an effort to assuage the anger that increases as the temperatures do. I especially liked how you came to my apartment, got distracted by my neighbor who peeked into my apartment with a wife beater, no bra, and short shorts, and then tried to leave without acknowledging what I had to say. Luckily for me, I stopped you and made you talk to me, even though I know you were itching to get to my neighbor's building to see the show. What you don't know is that she's a lesbian and is not thinking about your dumb ass, she simply desires functional AC like the rest of us. I suggest you identify the problem and fix it!


Jazzbrew said...

Damn! Blanchard and Marsalis in the same show?? Like Mo' Better Blues but better. I didn't know about that. Best believe I will be in the house for that. Good looking out (as always).

rashad said...

NO problem sir. Attending that show is an absolute must. And since you've interviewed Terence, you should be able to get backstage right?