Thursday, November 04, 2010

I need to put together a "navigating in the rain" handbook for my fellow DC citizens who walk the sidewalks, so I can avoid seeing incidents like I saw this morning. This young fellow, who looked to be my age (35) was walking swiftly, talking on his phone, holding an umbrella, and neglecting his surroundings. Had he been paying even a bit of attention, he would have seen the slippery grate in front of him, and sidestepped it like everyone was doing. You see, rule 4 in my yet-to-penned "Navigating in the Rain" handbook, is that you avoid all manhole covers, street grates, leaves, and anything else that can threaten your ability to look semi-cool. I learned this rule the hard way when I was in my early 20s.

So anyway, this guy took two steps on the slippery grate, and then he went down and he went down hard. He slipped, his head flew back, the umbrella went one way, the cellphone went another, and he just lost all control of his body. He seemed to be a proud man, because despite the hard fall, he bounced right up, reached for his lost belongings, and proceeded to keep stepping with purpose towards his destination. Unfortunately, his gait wasn't nearly as strong as confident as before, and he walked with a grimace and a noticeable limp. And then, to add insult to injury, he accidentally bumped umbrellas with another pedestrian, he lost his umbrella once again, and then he cursed at the lady who did it. The lady laughed at him and said, "That's why you fell on your ass bitch"...and this is when I finally started laughing too.

That's rule #23 in my upcoming book..don't curse at women when its raining. Their clothes are wet, their hair is jacked, they are carrying a million bags and an umbrella, and they are just waiting to unleash a barrage of expletives at someone who tests them. Anyway..

This is the first conversation I had when I finally did get in the office...

Co-worker: Hey Rashad, did you get wet?
Me: Nah, I'm good
Co-worker: You're lucky, I got pretty wet, and I still feel like I am
Me: Did you wipe off at least
Co-worker: I did, but I am still wet

Sexual harassment and the fact that she's damn near a senior citizen kept me away from the inappropriate jokes.

And finally, my son has a facebook page. I dont know whether to friend him, or to just watch from afar to see what does. But there will be a discussion about this tomorrow night when he arrives. Two of things he likes are Lady Gaga and Playboy..

Here is yet another Wizards article I wrote.

Layla - Eric Clapton

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