Monday, November 01, 2010

My nephew had his fourth birthday party this past Saturday in Harlem (shout out the Harlem Bowling Lanes), and I decided to go up to NY for the day to help celebrate(I must apologize to all my NY friends, it was only a day trip, I didn't do any leisurely visiting). My dad and his lady were there, as were my brother, my sister-in-law, and of course my nephew Nazir.

Prior to hitting up the bowling alley, we stopped at Sylvia's for lunch (shout out to our severely negligent waitress). The lunch was especially nostalgic for my dad, since he used to go to Sylvia's every damn day during freshman and sophomore years at Columbia. This was my first time, and it was his lady's first time to, so everyone was happy...BUT

During the waiting-for-the-food-to-arrive portion of the lunch, my father's lady started an ill-advised conversation about the clubs she used to frequent in Washington D.C. when she was "younger". She mentioned Love, Republic Gardens, and other clubs that I very clearly remember frequenting when I was "younger" and it got me to thinking, "How old is this woman?". She kept talking about how hard she used to party, and my brother and I were looking at each other like "this will not end well", but that didn't stop my father's lady from talking.

I could tell based on her references, that she had been clubbing in these spots less than 10 years ago, which means she was somewhere in her 40s (she's 48, my dad is 60). Now everyone has a past, so there's nothing wrong with that. But to bring up something about your past that a)my father hadn't heard before b)was at a family gathering and c)you seemed to enjoy a great deal, is just a clusterf**k of a situation. My dad was quietly taking it all in with the Spock eyebrow.

Afterwards, in a private moment, I told my brother that this woman wouldn't be around next year(c)Craig Mack. Based on the conversation I had with my dad this morning, she was already on thin ice, and this was the nail in the proverbial coffin.

So what's the lesson here? Don't talk at family gatherings if you aren't related to anyone. Just shut up until you are spoken to, and even then, give short, concise answers. My sister-in-law has it down to a science..she needs to put together a Cliff Notes version and hand it out to any and everyone who comes in the family.

Oh and if you're a Wizards fan, go vote in this poll.
Keith Sweat - Something Just Ain't Right


Redbonegirl97 said...

Wow, that is a rule all people need to remember. Only talk about the subject in general terms. Never give anyone your personal experience or opinion if you are a guest. Did you ever see "The Family Stone"?

Peace, Love and Chocolate

rashad said...

I did indeed see that movie..and that scene was awkward

Jazzbrew said...

At other people's family events your number one goal is to disappear. Everyone should know that. You should be gathering intel... not giving it out.

"Won't be around next year..."

Hilarious and motivation to queue it up on my iPod.

maxwellsmusze said...

jazzbrew knows his stuff. disappear/cosign/agree/head nod. those are your options. you can't go talking about clubbing it up like that. hilarious!