Saturday, May 16, 2015

First and foremost, please read my semi-depressing article on the abrupt, heartbreaking end to the Washington Wizards' season. I was there and as a fan in attendance, it was even more agonizing than it looked on television. As a writer, it gave me a chance to capture the mood. Here it is.

So today, I took advantage of the warm weather and the wife and kid being gone, to go for a nice 5-mile run in the middle of the day. My seven year old ipod was going in and out of consciousness, so it wasn't as smooth of a run as I would have liked, but I broke a sweat and felt the burn.

Towards the end of the run, I found myself having to stop at a red light, and I just so happened to share the curb with some high school girls. They were part of larger group, but the rest of their group had made it across the street, while the remaining 10-15 girls were with me. These girls were about as annoying as you would expect 14-17 year old girls to be. They were laughing, talking jibberish, texting on their phone, and just being the very antithesis of what I wanted to see and hear on my tranquil, disjointed run. I just turned the volume up on my headphones and kept it moving.

Now it just so happens that when I turned up the volume, the song that was on my ipod was Boogie Down Production's, "Criminal Minded", which came out in 1987. The beat isn't ideal for running, but I know all the words, and it distracts me from any pain I may be experiencing while I am trying to complete my run. In this instance, I could not run because of the insanely-long red light, so I jogged in place. Well if you're familiar with the song, you know there are lyrics (which are sung, not rapped), which go:

The girls look so good, but their brain is not ready, I don't know
I'd rather talk to a woman because her mind is so steady, so here we go

Those particular two lines were also the main chorus of a Chi-Ali song back in 1991 called, "Age Ain't Nothin But A Number". Anyway, I sang that first line pretty loud, and then it occurred to me that I was loudly singing that song around underaged girls. I quickly shut up before the second line, but the damage was already done because two of the girls looked at me in that creepy way they should like at shady old men. Luckily for me, the light turned green, and I ran twice as fast as I probably should have, just to avoid being summoned by Chris Hansen.

But still, what were the odds right?

Chi-Ali:


BDP:

1 comment:

maxwellsmusze said...

AHAHAHAHA! Chris Hansen #TCAP