Thursday, December 20, 2007

I was reading an article on Tiger Woods last night, when I came across the following quote:

"After my dad passed last year [Earl Woods died at age 74, after a long battle with cancer, on May 3, 2006], I played well, but I was still not really feeling all that great about life in general...I felt like I hadn't really appreciated having Dad around. I didn't talk to him as much as I should have. I didn't call him, didn't see him, wasn't there enough. It was kind of in my mind through the entire last year and even the beginning of this year that I didn't do enough...One thing I regret is that it took the fact of my dad's passing for me to appreciate how good my life was with him. I wish I had been able to realize how good it was when he was there."

As soon as I read that I thought of my own father. I worry more about my mother because she's in her mid 50s, she's in North Carolina by herself basically, and she doesn't have much companionship. I rarely worry about my dad in that way, because in my mind he's invincible, and I know he and his ladyfriend are pretty close. Sometimes I let 2 weeks go by without checking up on him, because I just assume he's ok, and since he's invincible why wouldn't he be? One time I even asked my father point blank, if something was wrong or if you were ill, would you tell me, and he said he would not because he didn't want me to worry. But even after he said that, he came right back with, "but Rashad I'm fine", and I just put the thought of anything bad happening to him right out of my head, and I went back to my every 2 weeks phone call routine. But that Tiger Woods quote made me think of my father's relationship with HIS father who died at age 50 back in 1978. One day my grandfather was there, playing with me and at that time my newborn brother, and the next day he died in his sleep, and even to this day, my father has some regret about not taking full advantage of their relationship. Now I'll admit my father and I are closer than he was with his father, but I also can honestly say that I should see him more, I should call him more, and I should push past the sports talk with him, and really make an effort to get to know him from all angles, because I don't want to be left with any regrets. And if I can do this with my mother, surely I can take that extra step to do with my father.

Jesus Children of American - Stevie Wonder

4 comments:

Sha said...

i sometimes envy the relationships some people have with their parents. Cherish your parents people...while they're here.

lex said...

my dad and i have a weird relationship. I love him to death, but he drives. me. crazy. Plus, the same as you, i kind of view him as invincible. A hold over from childhood i guess. It wasn't until this past summer, when he got sick(he NEVER gets sick) that it dawned on me that he wasn't as young as he used to be. I need to work on hanging with him more and just talking.

Janelle said...

I'm dealing with this right now with my mother again. I can't tell you how important it is to honor all those "if I could" or "if I have more time" moments. Make the time, make the effort. It will make all the difference.

miracle said...

Sometimes kids feel closer to their moms than dads. No matter how many times I call my dad a week just to say I love you I know my dad could die today and I probably wouldn't know til after the burial.