Thursday, August 05, 2010

I have today and tomorrow off, which means I will be spending my time writing in random coffee shops and lounges in the this wonderful city of Washington D.C. But first I have a few things to say..

1)I'd like to say thank you to the guy on the bike (not a motorcycle, just a regular bike) who came flying down an alley without looking both ways, and ran right in to me. I saw you coming out of the corner of my eye, but I thought you were going to stop, but you did not. Luckily for me, I protected myself and gave you the Heisman Trophy stiff-arm. I had tire tracks on my leg and minor discomfort, but you fell off your bike and spilled all your precious water. I wanted to feel sorry for you, but I don't so lets call it even. Driving/riding-down-an-alley etiquette calls for you to slow down as you get towards the sidewalk, especially when the alley opens up to a main street (U St for you DC folks).

2) I want to send a special, special shoutout to all you jackasses who littered my facebook, twitter and Gmail inbox yesterday, with messages that went a something like this, "Happy Birthday Obama!" or "Happy 49th Pres" or "Join Me in Celebrating Our President's 49th!"



Are you working on some sort of commission that puts money in your pocket if you get the word out that it was his birthday? Do you think I live in a cocoon, and I don't read the paper, watch CNN or listen to NPR? And what the hell do you get out of telling the masses like that? Its annoying, and there was no mass party spot where President Obama was going to grab the mic and thank everyone.

3)And lastly..and I really hate to write this, but lastly, I would like to thank my father. We hadn't talked in over 10 days until last night, and 2 minutes into our conversation, I heard you typing on the computer, which explained why you were barely paying attention to me. I asked you three times if you were busy or needed me to call you back, and you said no, and then kept right on shunning me. You came up for air briefly to discuss my WNBA article, then you kept right on snubbing me. If you can't multi-task, then just let me go, rather than making me cut the convo short. I do believe my little feelings were hurt..besides, my lady gets tired of being the only one I pour my heart out to.

That is all for now..


Miss. Lady said...

LOL! I wish you had your own reality series. I would love to witness some of the things you blog about.

maxwellsmusze said...

i read these with the jimmy fallon thank you notes music playing. although i quickly realized your thank yous are a bit angry and began hearing some ghostface music instead.